Maybe it was the shelter of darkness, making her feel a little less exposed despite the wretchedly vulnerable state she was in. Maybe it was just the sound of his voice, or the warmth of his hand in hers, or simply that her ability to fortify the walls meant to protect her was waning. Whatever the reason, as Jyn slowly lay down, staring up at the ceiling, she tried to find some words that she wouldn't have to keep herself from saying.
This was backwards, after all, in a way that she would have struggled to articulate. What to tell him and what not to, what she could even want from him, in her mind, those ought to have been her worries, not his. Not knowing how to say that, though, she started with something she could say, that she knew to be true.
"When we were on Jedha," she murmured, her breathing at least a little easier now. "You shot one of Saw's people to protect me. He was behind me with a grenade and I hadn't seen him. I think... that was when I first knew I could trust you. And then when we were on Yavin 4 and you came to volunteer... and you showed up on top of that tower and saved my life, again..."
She knew what she was trying to say, but not how to say it. Whatever they'd had here started back there. He wasn't the same person now, without the same history between them, but he was, too, in the ways that mattered most. She'd loved him, or started to, or something like it, before she ever wound up here at all, even if she would never have known to put that word to it.
Too tired and wrung out to be properly frustrated with herself, she exhaled slowly. "I guess all I mean is... Anything you want to know, I'd tell you. I just don't want you to think that... that I'd expect anything, or ask it, or... I don't know."
no subject
This was backwards, after all, in a way that she would have struggled to articulate. What to tell him and what not to, what she could even want from him, in her mind, those ought to have been her worries, not his. Not knowing how to say that, though, she started with something she could say, that she knew to be true.
"When we were on Jedha," she murmured, her breathing at least a little easier now. "You shot one of Saw's people to protect me. He was behind me with a grenade and I hadn't seen him. I think... that was when I first knew I could trust you. And then when we were on Yavin 4 and you came to volunteer... and you showed up on top of that tower and saved my life, again..."
She knew what she was trying to say, but not how to say it. Whatever they'd had here started back there. He wasn't the same person now, without the same history between them, but he was, too, in the ways that mattered most. She'd loved him, or started to, or something like it, before she ever wound up here at all, even if she would never have known to put that word to it.
Too tired and wrung out to be properly frustrated with herself, she exhaled slowly. "I guess all I mean is... Anything you want to know, I'd tell you. I just don't want you to think that... that I'd expect anything, or ask it, or... I don't know."